In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
40s are totally the cure
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
