I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
