how can u be prego again
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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