i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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