I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
