so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
