people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
