O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
