All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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