Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
