You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
