lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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