If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
then he tried to convert me to islam
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize