Sacagawea was the original milf.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Randomize
