Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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