Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize