WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Randomize
