I met the friendliest cop last night
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize