i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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