It's just like the Real World with babies
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize