i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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