erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Randomize
