what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
