SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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