This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
