just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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