I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Sext me about skeletons
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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