He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Randomize
