like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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