I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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