whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
