There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
