You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
