I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
