Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I will pee on everything he values.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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