She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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