why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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