she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Randomize
