oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
