I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
