no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
