yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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