Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
