how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
This is my gift to your gina
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize