did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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