.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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