I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
When did angry sex become our thing?
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Randomize
