So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
