she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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