I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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