hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
