if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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