I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Randomize
