we should wear snuggies to the strip club
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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